We were definitely not planning on finding out right away but I've been feeling more and more lately like this is our last. So, with that and the fact that I'd love for the girls to be able to call this baby their "baby brother"or "baby sister" we decided to have the results put in an envelope so we could find out someway special. Also, I've been feeling like this is a little man since the beginning and I really wanted to know if that was right or not. So, we had our u/s on Friday and had the technician write it down. I left with the girls then and my man went to work. I took the envelope out when we got to our destination and I held it up to the light to make sure that it was really covered. Needless to say, it wasn't. I freaked out! I called Dan right away and told him that I now knew and that I didn't know what to do. He laughed. Best reaction ever. I was sick to my stomach. And he laughed. Just what I needed.
I wanted to find out someway special. Like when we're in Costa Rica in two weeks. Or out at a restaurant on a romantic date. Or with the girls by opening something preplanned. But instead I found out by looking at the picture. Alone. It wasn't the least bit anti-climatic but it was surreal. Did I really see what I thought I saw?
I still wanted my man to find out in a special way so I took the girls shopping and we bought two outfits (I didn't want them to know already but looking back they were not paying attention at all and I could have totally bought the correct one right away) and two pairs of sandals. I had thought all along that if we did find out we might be able to use the fact that we met camping, fell in love camping, and have continued to camp throughout our marriage as a personal touch.
And then I went to lunch with most of my immediate family and had to lie to them. It slipped at one point in front of my mother and older brother but I tried to recover quickly. I did the best I could to keep my poker face and not react.
And then I had a play date with a friend. And upon seeing each other she quickly said, "I just had this funny feeling that God told me you're having a boy". To which I could say nothing because I really wanted Daniel to hear first.
I wrapped up the present that was correct after checking to confirm what I head read and waiting very impatiently for my man to come home.
Once he did we sat out on the porch and I filmed his reaction.
And I cried. A lot. I heard very clearly from God about a month ago that He was preparing my heart for a son but I didn't want to believe it. This is a longing I've carried through two full pregnancies. Don't get me wrong. I adore Greta and Audrey. I am so very grateful to be raising sisters, something I never biologically got to experience myself. I'm also more than grateful for who they are. But a son is different. Completely. And if we really are "done" then I would love to get to experience this.
And so, once again, we feel blessed. I feel so fortunate to be able to get pregnant. And I feel so fortunate that I now get to fall in love with a little man. Thank you for your continued prayers.